Becoming an investor and finding a partner are two of the biggest life projects anyone can embark on.
Ironically, they can also be the most difficult, because they’re both inherently personal exercises. Being a good partner and a good investor both require you to know who you are and what you want out of life. And it can be tough to admit that you aren’t where you want to be.
But here’s the good news. You have higher aspirations for your future self, and that’s worth cheering about.
We’re here to help you figure out the rest. Here’s a step-by-step guide to love and money, straight from a survey we conducted of 2,000 adults.*
Step 1: Define your identity
Setting up your profile on a dating app can be rough. You’re forced to write two pithy sentences about yourself without sharing too much or too little. You may have to be honest with yourself about who you are and what you want. But in the end, that honesty could serve you well in finding a partner who is best suited for you.
Knowing thyself is also at the heart of investing. Before you dump your money into that hot stock or cryptocurrency, you need to start with an honesty hour: why are you investing? There’s no wrong answer, but what you come up with can dictate the rest of your investing plan.
Your risk appetite can also be an important factor for both your relationship and your portfolio. In our survey, about 84% of respondents said it’s important that they find a partner who is open to trying and experiencing new things. If you’re not the adventurous type, that’s OK! Knowing where you stand is key.
In the markets, knowing your taste (and tolerance) for risk and adventure could help you decide which investments best suit you and your goals. Your friends may be investing in meme stocks, but if you can’t handle dramatic ups and downs, that may not be the best option for you. Sure, the S&P 500 has climbed an average of 8% per year since 1950, but it’s also gone through 32 drops of 10% or more. Bitcoin has had an incredible run, but you’ve had to survive a 20% sell-off every six months on average. That’s not easy.
If you’re investing for the long term — think several years or more — you may be able to stomach some swings. If you need your money soon, you may want to think more about what could best preserve your investment, while also earning some return.
Step 2: Determine your engagement
Now, the hard part: waiting for that answer back from the cutie you swiped right on. I’ve been there — creating the profile, swiping, then checking for a response incessantly. And if they do respond, you’re stuck overthinking about when you should respond. You’re excited, but you don’t want to seem desperate. Investing requires that you be purposeful about how often you check your portfolio. In fact, it can be even more tempting than your dating app. About 55% of people in the survey said they check their banking and trading apps more than their dating apps.
While staying engaged with your money can be wise, it can also backfire on you. There are real risks to staying too engaged, like overtrading and panic selling. Take the stock market’s COVID drop, for example. If you sold stocks on March 16 (the day the S&P 500 fell 12%, its worst drop since 1987), you would have missed some — or all — of the 100% rebound we’ve seen since then.
Your optimal action might depend on your time horizon. Short time frames may require you to keep a closer eye on your money. But as you look further into the future, today’s headlines could make less of an impact on your investing goals. Plus, a long-term investor’s biggest superpower is compounding — the snowball effect that can happen when your money grows exponentially over long periods of time. But in the words of investing guru Charlie Munger, the key to compounding is to “never interrupt it unnecessarily.”
Likewise, don’t scare off your potential partner with too much, too soon. Don’t ruin your portfolio by overthinking it. Sometimes, the best strategy is to do nothing.
Step 3: Align your values
Congratulations! You’ve swiped right and hooked a good partner. A few dates later, you think you’ve found the one.
But before you commit, you need to have the talk about life’s biggest priorities — marriage, kids, religion, politics, parenting styles. It’s an uncomfortable, but necessary step. This person may be physically compatible with you, but their values may be the difference between a fling and forever.
Now, consider going through the same exercise with your money. For most of history, money and values were thought to be mutually exclusive. But today, we’ve learned that you can make a difference with where you invest. Do your companies follow environmental, social, and governmental standards? Do you feel comfortable investing in a stock that doesn’t totally align with your beliefs?
Identity, beliefs, and money are more intertwined than ever, which is why we’ve seen the crypto community explode in popularity. Crypto is the market embodiment of identity and values. Crypto investors buy in for many different reasons, but many believe in a new global economy — one that is more open, transparent, fair, and equitable. And others see their crypto involvement as part of their identity. It makes sense that 33% of survey respondents say they would be inclined to date someone who mentions crypto in their dating profile (versus the 20% who said they would view it as a turnoff).
When you’re examining your portfolio, think about how your beliefs align with your investments. It’ll help you stick to your goals and rest easy knowing your money could be making a difference. And in the end, a company’s commitment to making the world a better place could benefit its bottom line (and in turn, its stock price).
*Survey research was conducted by Appinio from January 3–4,2022. Sample size included 2,000 adult US residents between the ages of 18 and 99. They did not need to be eToro platform users.
This communication is for information and educational purposes only and should not be taken as investment advice, a personal recommendation, or an offer of, or solicitation to, buy or sell any financial instruments. This material has been prepared without taking any particular recipient’s investment objectives or financial situation into account, and has not been prepared in accordance with the legal and regulatory requirements to promote independent research. Any references to the past or future performance of a financial instrument, index or a packaged investment product are not, and should not be taken as, a reliable indicator of future results. eToro makes no representation and assumes no liability as to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this publication.